Broken Little Person Sitting On A Tree Limb

Ahhh ...the Wacky Road Trip. What better test of manly fortitude, Yankee ingenuity, and tolerance of all manner of breathtakingly repugnant and unidentifiable aromas is there? Version 4.0 of the Wacky Road Trip recently occurred, where a group of us ventured west to visit our good friends 'Alice In Wonderbread' and 'H-Bomb' in the far-off and magical land known as Seattle. Participants in this year's excursion consisted of myself (Broken Little Person) and 3XHAR (under the respective guises of 'Espanto' and 'Mil Mascaras', both of us being the only veterans of every past WRT), Jeem (proudly wearing the banner of 'Jushin Thunder Liger' and making a sophomore appearance after having joined us for the first time on WRTIII), and three (that's right ...THREE!) rookies: 3XHAR's brother 'Bag Man' (of whom the honor and title of 'Senior Rookie' was bestowed upon), 'He Who Shall Have No Name', and 'Super HOTPA' (Translation: He's On The Phone Again?).

Wednesday, 07/19

4:30PM-5:30PM: Off to the airport to pick up our wondrous and hella-cool method of transport and conveyance (ummm …yeah …by ‘wondrous’ and ‘hella-cool’ I mean the rented minivan) from the friendly folks at one of the better-known national car rental agencies. What should typically be a 15 minute transaction turns into an hour+ excursion into the realm of calm and steadfast negotiation due to the fact that, while our reservation called for unlimited mileage, the contract that was being presented to us provided for 150 miles, with an additional charge applied to each subsequent mile. Seeing as how the round-trip for WRTIV would be in the neighborhood of 4000+ miles, we expressed some slight hesitancy regarding the contract as it was being presented to us.

The calm and steadfast negotiation mentioned previously was conducted exclusively by Jeem, who could make friends with a rattlesnake if the situation called for it, and who worked with an ever-changing cast of rental company employees (oh well …I guess 1 out of 3 isn't the worse ratio you can have regarding competence) to ensure that our needs were met and the original agreement was honored. 3XHAR and I were relegated to the far corner of the terminal by Jeem due to the fact that our negotiations typically begin with the opening salvo of "What the f**k?!!". While this may be a time-honored negotiation technique, it (for some unknown reason) sometimes sets an adversarial tone for the proceedings, and as such may negatively impact the outcome.

In the final analysis, Jeem's "you can catch more flies with honey" approach proved to be the right course of action (however, we had a pair of beating sticks in reserve just in case the 'honey' proved to be ineffective).

6:00PM-8:00PM: Our traditional pre-departure dinner (i.e., ' The Last Supper') with friends who wish to bid us a fond adieu in case we don't return. After all, one never knows what one might encounter on the WRT ...banjo-playing cannibalistic hillbillies, amorous moose, mountain zombies ...the dangers are virtually endless (i.e., without end). 'The Last Supper' provides us with one last teary farewell in the event that we don't return and also enables the significant others of any WRT participants to ensure that the life insurance papers are signed. In addition, in this instance, it provides the opportunity for many of our circle of friends to take notice of the fact that the afore-mentioned (who I reference in the previous blog entry) enchanting young lady is not a figment of my imagination but really is an actual person. In fact, she's 'Alice In Wonderbread's' sister …as such I can turn to Alice, due to that familial connection, to support my contention that I'm not referencing an imaginary friend when I refer to her (and by ‘her’ I mean the enchanting young lady who is Alice’s sister, not that Alice isn’t enchanting as well …just ask her husband). 

8:00PM: We bid farewell to our friends who joined us and, in the spirit of camaraderie, fraternity, and fellowship, we proceed to hit the road with a song in our hearts to chase them naughty blues away.

8:01PM: A cloud is cast over the spirit of camaraderie, fraternity, and fellowship, as the first internal gaseous expulsion occurs by someone of unidentified personage. I curse the existence of the culprit ...I will have ample opportunity to curse the existence of subsequent culprits many times over before the final mile is logged.

9:00PM: The first of the seven Wacky Road Trip Mix CD's is put on and we sing, Sing, SING!!

All together now ...

"I ain't got no panties, I ain't got no panties on.

 

…I ain't got no panties, I ain't got no panties on.

 

…I ain't got no panties on, I ain't got no panties on."

 

My, how time flies. It's been 6+ months since my last post ...it seems like only yesterday. The extended absence has been due mainly to a certain degree of apathy re/posting, but also (if you peruse my previous posts) a break from a trend towards even more gloom and melancholy than was/is normal even for me. Well ...the world is still a short, harsh, and brutish place, but things are a bit brighter in DavidWorld. Gainful employment was found earlier this year, I seem to have (temporarily at least) avoided being cast out on to the street, and I've recently (in a quite cautious / very early stages / one-step-at-a time / who knows where this may lead manner) started seeing a quite enchanting young lady. So, things are at least a bit lighter shade of gray.

We'll see if I manage to maintain a degree of dedication to posting, but for now my intention is to do so.

Universal Press Syndicate columnist Ann Coulter "joked" during a Thursday speech that liberal Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens should be poisoned. "We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' creme brulee," Coulter said at Philander Smith College in Little Rock, Ark. "That's just a joke, for you in the media."

Wow ...I didn't realize that Ms. Coulter was such a comic genius. Fascinating that if a pundit from the left were to make such comments re/Justices Scalia or Thomas no doubt the chorus of "fair and balanced" commentators would be screaming for their head on a platter. Can you say 'hypocrisy'? 

Now that we're a few days into the New Year, I thought I'd take a moment to bid a less than fond farewell to 2005.

Ahhhh, 2005 ...all in all I have to admit that it won't be missed. Some of my friends agree with me that 2005 proved to be a somewhat less than shining year in our lives. While I consider myself far removed from a state of eternal optimism, even I've found my normal gray outlook of things to be even darker than usual. Career derailment, economic travails, unrelenting loneliness, parental failing health ...these are just some of the personal highlights from the past 12 months. I find that I view 2005 as one of the worst years of my life. Certainly in the top (or bottom as the case may be) three ...(the others being 1988-the year my father died, and 1994-which held the dual honor of being the year I was laid off from my first job which I'd held for 11 years, and also the year that The Demon Bitch From Hell announced that she'd been impregnated by another guy ...but that's another story).

For others wthin my group of friends you can throw in familial passing, romantic uncoupling, and abandoned friendships. Yes ...2005 can't fade into the forgotten mists of time fast enough (at least as far as I'm concerned).

I can't imagine 2006 being any worse (well, actually I can, but I'm trying my hardest not to sink any further into the depths of darkness and despair). That being said, against my better judgment (and even though I was awake most of last night worrying about the future) I surprisingly find myself being somewhat hopeful for the New Year. We shall see if this flickering light at the end of the tunnel comes to pass, but for now I'm crossing my fingers and tentatively stepping down the path towards what will (hopefully) be better times. For now though, to 2005 I simply say so long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye ...you sucked. 

The annual Christkwanzukkah celebration was held yesterday evening at Jim and Kathy's. Photos capturing the festivities are posted in the new album (Holiday Party 2005) on the right. Drink up shriners!

Sometimes gravity pisses me off.

Having just returned from spending a few days this week for Thanksgiving "up North", there are a few different observations I can make about rural Wisconsin, but for me what sums it up best is the following ...

If I heard the song '30 Point Buck' one more time, I would have put my fist through the dashboard. 

Check out the website of artist Luke Chueh. It's located here. It's not often that you'd categorize something as being both cute and bleak, but I'd say his art qualifies. Here are a few samples ...the first is titled 'Feeling Blue' and the second is 'The Soundtrack (To My Life)'.

         

Yep ...it's definitely the soundtrack to mine anyway.

Yow! It's been almost a month and a half since my last posting. I've been somewhat remiss due to the whirlwind of activity that has surrounded my life. Let's see ...where to begin?

New and exciting job? ...Ummm, no ...still unemployed with the walls starting to close in.

Possible prospects to achieve a new and exciting job? ...Ummm ...well ...multiple resumes sent to multiple companies with little in the way of responses. They say that no news is good news but somehow I don't think that platitude holds true here.

Still, no worries ...at least there's the comfort of being able to draw from the severance package from my last employer and the steady flow of unemployment. ...Ummm, yeah ...that's not quite the case. The coffers are almost bare with unemployment set to expire within a few weeks. A pity really, since I've often equated obtaining material possessions with happiness (or at least an unreasonable facsimile of happiness), but the budget these days limits pursuit of that. The way it stands now I'll be out on the streets just about the time that the snow starts falling. Yes, timing is everything.

Well, at least there's the heady rush of romance in the air. ...Ummm, yeah ...not quite the case. Still flying in the same solo pattern that I have for the last few years, with no prospects on, above, beneath, or alongside the horizon. It's times like these that I almost start wishing that I had voices in my head ...at least that way I'd be talking with someone other than myself.

Did I say I haven't been posting due to the whirlwind of activity surrounding my life? Oops ...I meant due to the ever-present state of hopelessness and apathy that I find myself entrenched in ...my mistake. On the plus side, at least my name isn't 'Scooter' ...then I'd really be depressed.

...Not that the end of the week is any different for me these days than the beginning or middle of the week, but regardless ...A few musings, observations, and reflections, some of which are no doubt fueled by the fact that I've been up for about 30 hours straight (ahhh, insomnia ...you gotta love it) and as a result, am a tad bit cranky.

If misery loves company, why do I so often find myself sitting alone in the dark?

Rather than stating that "things happen for a reason", perhaps people should instead say "weebles wobble but they don't fall down!" ...the two statements have about the same degree of realism and factual content attached to them. But then again, weebles do wobble and don't fall down, so I'm probably doing weebles a disservice by placing them in the same category as that "things happen for a reason" hoo-hah.

Dr. Neil Clark Warren would have been quite adept at selling snake-oil.

Funny, but with each passing day I find myself thinking that nihilists just might have the right idea.

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are having a girl, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (supposedly) got married, and Kate Moss has entered rehab ...remarkably enough, I don't care.

An article in the most recent issue of 'Newsweek' discusses the concept of a 'Type D' personality, and how having a 'Type D' personality can increase your chances of developing heart disease. The article contains a test designed to measure your Negative Affectivity and Social Inhibition. You answer a series of questions and add up the applicable scores and, if your Negative Affectivity score is 10 or higher and your Social Inhibition score is 10 or higher, you qualify as a 'Type D' personality (and thus, potentially increase your chances of developing heart disease). My Negative Affectivity score was 21. My Social Inhibition score was also 21. So ...I have that going for me.

Happy, happy, joy, joy.